...The biggest losers of the Civil War wee slaveowners but the everyday working class citizen. The leaders of both sides chose war instead of diplomacy, and as a result, an egregious bloody war happened where rights were trampled and millions of young men, women, and children were masscred despite having nothing to do with slavery and/or Lincoln's thirst for power.
Something that many debates on the diplomacy leading up to the Civil War seem to consider is that, Lincoln had no Constitutional authority to surrender an Federal Fort. The Constitution is very clear that this is in the perview of Congress. And although the Confederacy had been negotiating with Buchanan, who gave them all sorts of assurances and promises, Buchanan also had no Constitutional right to surrender Fort Sumter.
Even though there was a special session of Congress between March 4th (Lincoln's Inauguration) and March 28th, the issue of Sumter and Southern Union Forts was not addressed.
Therefor, if Lincoln would have simply allowed the Confederacy to take Sumter, an argument could be made that he was violating both his oath of office AND the Executives Constitutional Authority. So, in my opinion, the South were the ones who directly chose war over diplomacy. Because, also in my opinion since it's rewriting history, I believe that if they had not fired on Sumter, and allowed Congress to reconvene, they most likely would have been allowed out of the Union since anti-war sentiment was high in early 1861.
Making the choice to fire on Sumter quickly removed all that sentiment right quick.
Regarding the OP: Before you start blaming the 'Libs' and 'Cancel Culture' for the removal of Lee's statues, please tell me what the purpose of those statues are in the first place?
Lee and all the other Confederate Generals defied the United States and what it stood for. Why should they be honored in the first place? And understanding the time and socio political issues wracking this nation when a majority of statues were put up helps to understand even more the questions of why they should be removed from certain places.
Anecdotely, I worked in Mississippi and i none small down, right out in front of the court house, was a statue of a local Confederate General. How do you think a black American might feel about justice if that is what represents a hero of the local justice system?